Suns And Shadows

Before continuing, please take 5 minutes to read Plato’s Allegory of The Caves here.

Yesterday, I deleted instagram for the rest of the year for the 3rd time this year. 

I deleted it in January for the rest of the year as part of my New Year’s Resolution. Then again in March when I was spending too much time on it while looking for a new job. And now again yesterday after feeling like I was relying on it too much to get to know people instead of actually getting to know people in real life.

This time's for real though. This time, I’m REALLY done with instagram for the rest of the year…

There are few truly good things in life. Few things that really make life worth living. 

We generally agree on what these good things are  - community, happiness, love etc. - and we all want these things in our lives.

My Dad always says “nothing ever worth having comes easy.” I imagine it was the perpetual elusiveness of these good things that birthed a statement like that. They’re so hard to find, these good things. Even harder to hold onto.

In Plato’s allegory, these good things are the suns. They are the ideals for which we strive. The things for which we stay alive. They’re the real things.

Community, for example, is a sun. Genuine friendship and connection with people that see and support you. It’s one of those things that as I’ve grown older, I’ve noticed fewer and fewer people have and more and more are looking for. The quality of our relationships, according to the longest study on happiness conducted by Harvard, is the strongest determinant of a happy and healthy life.  After tracking the lives of more than 700 men over 75 years, it wasn’t money, it wasn’t status, it wasn’t fame that mattered. But the strength and depth of our relationships is what makes for a long and fulfilled life. Our need for other people is a truth that we cannot escape.

If community is the sun, then social media is its shadow - the counterfeit that we embrace in the sun’s absence. And just as in Plato’s allegory, stare at the shadow too long and you may start mistaking it for the real thing. Or worse,  grow up with the shadows, and you may never realize that you were looking at a counterfeit all along.

Deleting instagram is my way of rejecting the shadow. In Plato’s allegory, it’s recognizing that the dancing figures on the wall aren’t real and are only reminiscent of the real thing that I want - community. Social media certainly serves its purposes and has resulted in some good, but if it’s true community we’re looking for, I don’t think anybody would say it comes close to real life, in person, fellowship and connection. It’s merely a shadow of the sun.

But then again, genuine community is hard to find and harder to keep. So when we (I) can’t find it, maybe scrolling endlessly on instagram, watching the highlight reel of my “friends’” lives is good enough - or accessible enough - to make me feel some semblance of the sun’s warmth. And so I end up in this dance - downloading and deleting, downloading and deleting, downloading and deleting - as I try to turn from the counterfeit and embrace the real thing.

Thinking of the things I want in life as suns and shadows has proven helpful. I’ve even caught myself saying things like “No no, don’t do that, it’s just a shadow of what you really want” when wrestling with some of my lesser vices and habits.

While there are few good things in life, there are many counterfeits masquerading in their place. I thought it’d be fun to pick a few to write about.

But first, a framework. A (brief) framework that if the subsequent posts are never read, I hope can be a bit helpful in doing away with the counterfeits and embracing the real good things in your life.

1. Identify your suns and shadows

We generally agree on the core good things, but all good things to me are not necessarily the same good things to you. A very good thing to me is not always as good a good thing to you.

We each come to this world with our own view of what’s important and what will make for our happy life.

What are yours?

2. Be prepared to turn your body

While extreme, Plato’s use of chains and evocation of what are essentially slaves to the shadows is not entirely off base. Counterfeits can be very alluring. And it can be difficult to turn away from the fake to the real thing.

The protagonist’s turning of the body in Plato’s allegory can be seen as a complete 180 - a whole-hearted departure from his old life to a better one.

It’s difficult to change. Perhaps even harder is to want to change. Either way, be prepared for the work that embracing the good things in life may require.

3. Beware of the puppeteers

Mark Zuckerberg has amassed a 180 billion dollar fortune selling shadows of community.

Hollywood brings in billions of dollars worldwide streaming shadows of true love.

Corporations stay incorporated by peddling you shadows of worth and importance through your job.

In Plato’s allegory, the shadows don’t make themselves. There are puppeteers, hanging in the background, “carrying objects back and forth along the partition, things of every kind: images of people and animals, carved in stone and wood and other materials.”

Be wary of the powers and people that be who want us to believe the counterfeits are the real thing. There are industries and individuals with vested interests in making sure we keep staring at the shadows they make on the wall. 

4. Give yourself time to adjust

The first two days after deleting instagram, it usually feels a little strange. At least it was for me. In those two days, I constantly found myself wondering what others were up to, or out of habit, I would scroll over on my phone to where the app used to be only to find it empty.

But after those two days, it’s surprisingly easy living without the app. It’s amazing, no? How soon we adjust to life without the things we thought we needed. In enough time, we may even go days or weeks without those things slipping our minds.

Whatever your good thing is, and depending on how chained you are to its shadow, it’s going to feel a bit strange turning to the proverbial light. Like the little addicts we are, we’re going to want to go running back to what’s familiar even if what’s familiar is harmful.

Give yourself time to adjust to the light. The uncomfortableness is part of the process.

I’m done pretending. I want the real thing.

That’s the word for these next few posts, and by extension, the next few weeks of my life 🙂

Here’s to stepping out of the shadows.